Thursday, May 09, 2019

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Choosing a Wife

   by Reb Gutman Locks


HH asked;

     Six years ago I saw a girl and instantly had a supernatural feeling. I felt like I would marry her. It was so intense. I fell down off my seat! Two years ago, I tried to arrange a date with her, and she said she wasn't interested for some reasons like I was Chabad, and although I said I was openminded she didn't go out with me. I am dating now and need to know what is the right path, the way of Hashem, to know and do in this situation?    

     Does love at first sight mean she in my intended wife? If so, what should I do?


Gutman's reply;

     If the "experience" was from Hashem she would not have said no. Move on. Love is not a spark when you first see someone. Love is an emotional relationship that develops from sharing life, being kind to each other.

    "Do not follow your eyes and your heart that will lead you astray."

     Do not be so fast to let go of your tradition to marry someone. The husband sets the tradition not the wife.

     Find a girl who wants to share her life with you, a girl who gets along with her family, especially with her mother.

     Do not be like a small child who picks a treat by the colorful cartoons on the package, look at the ingredients.

     If you are going to follow the teachings of the Rebbe you best marry a girl who also wants to follow those teachings.

    Pray for others to find their spouses and you will find yours first.

    Hashem bless you to choose the right young lady.

Be well 

HH replied:

    Amen. Thanks, rav!! Wow thanks for the response and guidance. Thanks. 


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