by Reb Akiva at Mystical Paths
Is it over yet? Is the recession done yet? Has the stimulus stimulated yet?
As the NY Times writes "As the country takes a bullet train to bankruptcy, the last Democratic president urged the current one to “embody” that old American spunk", US President Obama has promised to cut the US deficit in half by 2013 while simultaneously borrowing the US economy out of recession.
Simultaneously the banks, into which has been invested $750 billion dollars, are currently worth less than the value of their paper deposit slips.
In world politics, the US applauded the democratic process in Venezuela for voting on a constitutional change allowing a dictator, and applauded China for buying US treasury bonds while continuing to ship products made by slave labor to the US. In England, with more police surveillance cameras per mile than any country in the world, the police run from Muslims protesting Jews not allowing themselves to be killed and promote "suicide bomber understanding" courses in public schools. Germany has come up with an engineering plan to save the world (starting with Europe) by regulating every investment - with a democratic government clerk being required to approve each and every investment a person may make, thereby giving them a feeling of safety in the freely controlled investment of their money.
Meanwhile at the UN, with millions being killed in Sudan, Jews being slaughter in Yemen, the complete meltdown of the nation of Zimbabwe (where a loaf of bread can be had for only ZD$ 10,000,000,000) along with a cholera epidemic (sewage in your drinking water anyone?), the main trouble of the world to be discussed in Durban is the horrible Israeli treatment of Arabs (who just won 11 seats in the Knesset). Not to be outdone, the IAEA (the International Atomic Energy Agency) which has declared multiple times over the last 5 years that Iran has no nuclear materials, no military intentions (while it's leader specifically announces planned genocide), and is completely clean and not the least bit radioactive, put a little P.S. at the end of their report noting enough enriched plutonium found for at least 1 nuclear warhead. However, the fact they just used an ICBM (that's an intercontinental ballistic missile) to put a satellite in orbit shouldn't actually worry anyone.
However, the IMPORTANT news is it's Oscar night in the US, and Michelle Obama has been spotted in a new outfit! For those with a job, the president has arranged a massive tax cut of $13 per month for you (unless you make more than $100,000, in which case you get to pay $130 per month). This way you'll be able to run right out and by the new small cars from GM that the government will be mandating they manufacture - because they KNOW you want one.
You who have a job and, gasp, the nerve to actually be making money (such as Walmart, McDonalds, bankruptcy attorneys, tailors and cobblers) better start thanking Hashem for it, because the tide has turned. If you're not willing to turn your business over to the US government (or take government money if THEY say you must), then you're obviously an unpatriotic ape. (Don't dare draw a cartoon of that, or it will be interpreted to be an insult to the president's ethnicity.)
Those over 50 may remember the following terms. Those under 50 would be wise to Google them...
The good news is faith in wallets and little green pieces of paper (or blue, or orange, or purple, depending on your country) is quickly fading. Faith in HaKodesh Baruch Hu and Torah still hasn't gone out of style and awaits the return of her children. While unfortunately the terms above are coming into style, the terms below should remain a focus...
...and remember, by government instruction, have a nice day!
Monday, February 23, 2009
// 2/23/2009 //